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shadows of echoes of memories of songs
j4
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rysmiel From: rysmiel Date: August 28th, 2003 09:12 am (UTC) (Link)
I wouldn't want to imply (I'm not sure whether or not you are doing so...) that anybody having a problem with these statements had "ego issues" -- if you-when-depressed stop reading other-depressed-people, then you're potentially already in some kind of feedback loop.

I think I may just be talking about what you talk about below, in different words.

I do have a problem, though, if I say "I need to stop talking to person X [ or to person X about issue Y ] for specific reason Z to do with how I feel right now, and will come back as soon as I can", and person X insists on hearing that as a value judgement of them, or of how I feel about them, or of how important they are to me - which is essentially accusing me of lying when I go to the effort of explaining reason Z. The degree to which I am willing to put up with that grows ever less as I get older.

Fortunately, the simple application of Darwinian principles over time means I don't have many people in my life who do that any more. Ye gods it can hurt when they do though. I really hate people forcing their models of emotional reality onto the way my mind works.

[ There's also "I would rather not read your journal right now because I could really do with some time to calm down about the particular argument we're having or I might lose my temper in ways that could end the friendship." I like to think that any sensible person reading that would hear it as about me doubting myself and valuing the friendship enough not to want to hurt it.]
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