Also ended up reading the project history. Read this extract and weep:
When images were loaded on the website by InterConnect, about 10% were unreadable due to lines on the pages, but that was a DjVu program issue that was eventually solved. The DjVu software originally chosen to display the images proved to be very slow. Images were loaded to CD jukeboxes, but again, retrieval was slow plus CDs were getting scratched, so at the end of 2000 the images were moved to spinning disk and PDF. Some images were lost in the process of migrating.
New product manager started in March 2000. She ran into large numbers of customer and sales rep complaints, both concerning EEBO MARC records and the web product. Most complaints were about missing or mismatched images or illustrations, incorrect reel locations, slow image display, and mistakes in the citations and MARC records. Somehow there were a lot of duplicate citations on the web, one of which usually was not linked to an image although it appeared to link. A work-around was put in place in April 2002 to add a message to citations with no images so customers click on fewer dead ends. A correction tool was never developed, so repairing incorrect links to images and illustrations was (and still is) basically impossible.
This is the project I'm supposed to be helping to rescue. Shall I shoot myself now, or wait till later?
After running out of documentation to read, I chatted to the Software team for a bit, was fed Jelly Bellys and macaroons, and borrowed Programming Perl so I'd have something to read.
Lunchtime was a blessed relief; by that point I was feeling twitchy, frustrated, and randomly mopey. Went and bought shoes, books (Stephen King / Peter Straub, "Black House"; and Brigid Brophy, "Reads") and an avocado, which helped. Back at work, I went straight to the kitchen and made myself an enormous salad including said avocado and previously-purchased prawns, much to the amazement of cow-orkers.
Returned to the office to find that we'd just been told we could bugger off for another hour or so as nothing was likely to get fixed any time soon, and IT wanted all our PCs shut down. So I went out into the quad with Alys and did some karate, and we talked about martial arts. Then came back inside to find things still weren't fixed, so I read the first essay in the Brigid Brophy book.
Network finally restored, I still failed to get any work done. Caught up with LJ/news/etc., prodded eBay (and discovered that the electric violin I was after is probably out of my price-range, since I've put in my maximum bid and it's still not over the reserve), tried to buy things online only to be defeated by insane order-forms, and ate some slightly off strawberries.
The lemming du jour is extremely pointless.
What facial feature do you find the most attractive on others?
Depends on the person. Smiles are always good, though.
Would you vote for a woman candidate for president?
If she was likely to make a good president, yes. I wouldn't vote for her just because she was a woman.
Would you marry for money?
Only if it was some kind of scam guaranteed to make money for both partners. And if we could divorce again afterwards. And then make a fortune selling our story to That's Life. (I have no shame.)
Have you had braces?
Yeah, but only the removable kind. Unless you mean the trousers kind, in which case, I don't think I've ever worn any.
Do you pluck your eyebrows?
Do you ever cut or hurt yourself?
Not any more.
Could you live without a computer?
Not easily at the moment, but yes.
Do you drink enough water?
Do you wear shoes in the house or take them off?
Take them off.
What is your favorite fruit?
I don't have a favourite. I like lots of fruit. I have some strawberries in my bag, some cherries in the fridge, and a sudden craving for sharon fruit (of which I currently have none).
Do you eat wheat bread or white?
Both, but I generally prefer white.
What is your favorite place to visit?
Are you photogenic?
Not in the slightest. I look even more gawky and ugly in photos than I do in real life.
Do you dream in color or black and white?
Are you wearing fingernail polish?
Not at the moment.
Do you have any dimples?
Er... don't think so.
Do you remember being born?
What kind of stupid question is that?
Why do you take surveys?
Boredom. Compulsive self-dissection. Fascination with just how inane surveys can be.
Did you like or do you like high school?
I liked a lot of the work, and I liked some of the people.
When you are asleep do you like being kissed?
If I'm asleep I probably won't even know about it. <shrug>
Do you think women should be expected to shave their body hair?
I don't think anybody should be expected to shave their body hair, regardless of gender. But I think anybody should be free to do so if they want to.
Do you like salty food or sugary food the most?
I like both.
Is a flat stomach important to you?
Are you tolerant of other peoples beliefs?
Mostly, yes. I'm not terribly tolerant of intolerance, though, or of people forcing their beliefs on others.
When you watch a movie at home, do you like the lights on or off?
Do you believe in magic?
"There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy."
Do you have nightmares frequently?
Do you like your nose?
I don't really like the shape of it, but hey, how would I smell without it?
Do you listen to music daily?
Most days, yeah.
At what age did you find out that Santa Claus wasn't real?
He isn't?? ... Oh, I don't know. About 7, I think.
How many pairs of shoes do you have in your closet?
In my closet (wardrobe?), about 10. In the rest of the house, about another 40. Just call me Imelda, eh.
Do you like to wear the same shoes everyday or do you like a variety?
I like variety, but the shoes I wear on a day-to-day basis tend to be limited to shoes I can walk/cycle in easily. Currently wearing sandals to keep feet cool.
Do you write poetry?
Sometimes. I don't show it to anybody any more, though. I'm tired of getting all nervous about showing it to people only to have them not comment at all or just say "um, yeah, whatever". It's just depressing.
Do you snore?
Do you sleep more on your back, front, or sides?
I always go to sleep on my right-hand side. No idea what happens once I'm asleep.
Do you lick stamps?
Yes! I don't like the self-adhesive ones. I like the taste of stamps. Mmmmm.
Do you use an electric can opener?
Have you ridden in a hot air balloon?
No, though I'd like to.
Which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?
Well, er, physical pain hurts the most physically, and emotional pain hurts the most emotionally. (Stupid question!)
Do you think balding men should shave their heads?
I don't think anybody "should" do anything with their appearance other than what they want to do.
Do you know anyone who is clinically depressed?
Do you prefer a piano or a violin?
To play: piano. To listen to: folk fiddle.
Do you know someone who has cancer?
Not as far as I know.
Do you like to hunt?
Never tried. I'd hunt for my food if I had to, but I don't want to hunt for sport.
Do you have a middle name? What is it?
Are you tired?
Yes. Have been tired pretty much all the time for about the last 7 years.
Did you drink anything with caffeine in it today?
Not yet, but I think I drank enough caffeine yesterday to compensate...
How long is your hair?
Down to my waist.
Do you get along with your parents?
What color of eyes do you prefer?
I don't have a preference. I'd like to have mirror-eyes, though.
Are you a virgin?
What medications do you take?
Contraceptive pill. Antihistamines sometimes when hayfever gets bad, but it's been fine this year.
What does your bedroom look like?
Messy. Nasty magnolia woodchip wallpaper and green carpet (haven't got round to decorating yet), double bed, dressing-table piled high with jewellery, makeup and bits of paper and stuff; chest-of-drawers similarly piled high; lots of shoes everywhere, lots of clothes on the floor. Two enormous wardrobes groaning under the strain of my clothes.
Are you basically a happy person?
Eh? Sometimes I'm happy. Sometimes I'm not. It's called being human.
Nearly time for karate. At this rate I'll be swimming there rather than cycling. Bloody rain. Why can't it go back to being ridiculously hot and sunny so we can all whinge about overheating and sunburn? That was much more fun.